How can you re-enter a world that has been forever changed?

What is Re-Entry Anxiety?

The phrase re-entry anxiety is being talked about a lot now. In it’s most simple definition, re-entry anxiety refers to the stress or hesitancy about getting back to a “normal” life.

When you think about re-entry, what are you feeling?

As we move closer and closer to a full re-opening — and in spite of our own eagerness to put the pandemic behind us — many of us will notice feelings of discomfort. This makes sense. You can feel both relief at approaching a finish line and grief, anxiety, sadness, anger, and/or a number of other opposing emotions. We’ve all just spent over a year in a holding pattern. Drifting - sometimes feeling a bit directionless. Doing our part and still watching an ever-changing finish line. You may have had periods of depression, intense anxiety, or maybe some sense of being in the middle, languishing area, too. You may still be experiencing these.

Check in with yourself — What happened in your personal world over the course of the pandemic?

Close your eyes for a moment and think about everything that has happened in your life since March 2020. You may have lost a job. You may have lost a family member or close friend. You may have experienced friendships change. Your ties to a community (sports, religion, family get togethers, etc) were put on hold. You may have had to draw boundaries that you didn’t think you had to. If you worked from home or did school from home, your relationship to both work and school has changed. Your general sense of safety may have become a bit less certain and still feel destabilized. As a result of all of this, your personal values may have strengthened or transformed. This pandemic has changed the way we experience the world. There is no going back. The version of yourself today is a different person than the version of yourself from March 2020.

We’ve had to let go of a lot, whether or not we were ready. In the face of loss, there may have also been gains. With so much time alone, or living differently than “normal” - what did you notice about yourself through this experience?

What parts of your life did the pandemic shine a light on?

• Did your relationship with food, alcohol, or exercise change?

• Did you discover that how busy you were before was actually exhausting?

• Did you find a hobby you enjoy? Or did you let go of something that caused stress or harm?

• Did you discover more about your needs in friendships or relationships?

• Did the blurred lines between work, school, and home create pause for you in how much space works takes up, or how you would want it to be different?

• Did your ability to navigate through this uncertainty surprise you?

You may have uncovered some powerful strengths. You may have also uncovered some concerning behaviors. All of this is okay. The important piece is to notice where you’re at now and consider if you like being there or if you desire change.

Navigating Re-Entry

While re-entry is framed as a going back to “normal,” there isn’t really a normal to go back to. Your employer or other large systems may say otherwise and hold on to “normal” or pre-pandemic expectations. This difference in expectations (from your employer, your friends, your family) can create it’s own stress. You are forever changed by your experiences. This may sound alarming, but there’s a hidden gift that if you can’t go backwards you can only go forwards and you get to decide what that looks like. Re-entry can be a time to examine what you want to take with you from your experience. It may be helpful too, to think of this as simply entry rather than re-entry. You’re not fitting yourself back into something, your simply moving forward.

How can you best support yourself in this transition?

• Accept what you are feeling — As much as you may want to “just get through it,” you need to allow space for your uncomfortable emotions. They can reveal important information about your needs.

• Communicate — Notice what your needs are and speak up for yourself.

• Go at your own pace — You should never feel rushed to do something that you are not ready for. Transition takes time. Be mindful of the pace you need.

• Reach out for help if you need it — If you notice yourself feeling particularly overwhelmed, reach out for help from a close friend, coworker, or a therapist.

So, how can you re-enter a world that has been changed forever? One step at a time. Holding kindness for yourself and your experience.

Poem:

Upasama- Calm 

How do

you cross

the flood?

You cross

calmly-

one step

at a time,

feeling

for stones.

How do

you cross

the flood,

my heart?

You cross

calmly-one step

at a time,

or not at all.

From The First Free Women-Poems of the Early Buddhist Nuns